About

This is a place where I want to write, to help me on my journey to be more the way I would like to be. So, who am I? Well, that is a more complex question than you might think! I would probably describe myself in different ways depending who I was talking to. But this, this is for me primarily. Somewhere I can work this stuff out. So, in a nutshell…I’m in my early thirties, so is my husband. We have two infant school aged children, two cats and some tropical fish. I want to make a difference to others, help those in need, see broken people healed, lives restored and children happy. Sometimes I try to do those things, I am qualified as a child and adolescent psychotherapist working creatively (play therapist) . I do fundraising/awareness raising of issues to do with human trafficking… Because this stuff matters. But sometimes I am faced with the fact that in some ways I myself am  pretty broken and horrible! I have so many things to be thankful for. I love my children, my husband, my job, where I live…so many things. There are so many things to be thankful for. I love God. But still, I have these battles in my mind and life that affect me. Sometimes more than others. I don’t want it to always be this way. I don’t want it for me or for the people I care about. I don’t want it for my children or my husband. I want to believe for more. Because I believe nothing is impossible with God. He’s massive. So much bigger and more able than I give him credit for. But, my faith doesn’t mean I don’t have difficulties. It doesn’t mean I do things right. I’ve messed up big time. There is a long way to go. I’m  on anti-depressants and in December 2013 went on an anti-psychotic medication to treat the “tics”. I’m off work at the moment because of my symptoms, symptoms which are scary sometimes.. The psychiatrist hasn’t given a diagnosis as such yet..neurology will also be getting involved. But I don’t want any of this to define me. I am me. I want to discover who that is more, just me as me. I want to be defined as someone who is loved by God. We all are, that isn’t some self-inflated ego talking…we are all loved incredibly. But I want that to hit home, reach the darkest parts of me with a depth of healing and bring true and unrelenting transformation. I want shalom in my life and my loved ones’ lives: life as God intended it to be.